Wow-You're-Hot Wednesday: Everyone Makes Fun of Me

     Seriously, what is wrong with the world? I can't even enjoy hot guys without someone making fun of my taste. Every time this guy comes up in conversation, I can't help but drool a little and go all dreamy-eyed. This inevitably prompts the other person to laugh and comment on his bald head...or his short stature...or the fact that he's "old." That's great, guys. I don't care. This dude is smoking hot.

     My deep-seated love for K Ches started waaaay back when. Well, it seems that way to me, because it's spanned (quick math...) roughly 3/4 of my life. I fell in love with his music at the ripe old age of 5, and I've been head-over-heels ever since. Notice all the love references? I'd totally leave my man for Kenny at the drop of a hat. It's a known fact of our relationship. (Note to self: mention "my man" more often.)

     Remember the first paragraph of the Effington post where I mentioned the fact that some guys' voices totally chill me out? Kenny is the main dude in that arena. His voice alone has pulled me out of some pretty dark (depression-induced) places. If the earth's surface represents where normal people normally are emotionally, I've been down in the Mariana Trench a few times. The release of Kenny's latest album, Hemingway's Whiskey, coincided with my roughest patch to date. Talk about perfect timing. I swear, the guy's a fricking angel or something. Okay, enough with the dramatic descriptions of how sad I've been.

     That being said, I think it's safe to assert that the basis for my adoration here is probably the most solid of any others on my hot dudes list. This boy's from a little itty-bitty spit of a town (less than 1,000 people) in Tennessee, so he's got that kinda-cute country vibe. What really gets me, though, is the whole beachy theme; many of his songs are very Caribbean-inspired, he owns a yacht, and he has a home down in the USVI. A big dream of mine is to live on an island in the Caribbean, so Kenny is definitely relevant to my interests.

     In preparation for this post, I started looking through the pictures I had saved on my computer. There are 26 Kenny pics (in addition to the one above) that I decided were worthy of this post. I know, it's a lot. I'll just put them down here all tiny again (they're really not that tiny...) and marvel at the technology that lets you guys see them big. (When it comes to technology, I'm an old soul -- I never understand it.)

     I've also noticed that these posts tend to be rather picture-heavy. It is about the guy's looks, of course, so I have to showcase that. But it seems like a cop-out to end a post in a flurry of pictures. I'm not really sure which route to go: keep it the way it is, or start trying to include the pictures in the actual "meat" of the post. That's a mental debate for another day, though.

       

I got bored one day.
Don't you dare judge me.

These edits are about a year old.
Picnik, baby.

I'd never try to pass this off as art.
They've been sitting on my computer.

I'm convinced that's
Dr. Phil in the back.

Wow-You're-Hot Wednesday: Anderson Cooper

     I was torn while deciding who to write about this week. See, I had promised myself -- I basically made an Unbreakable Vow -- that I'd just go in order. I have my pretty list of pretty guys, so why deviate? That would just get me all sorts of confused. For the past few days, though, I've been listening to (and more than mildly Internet-stalking) Ben Folds constantly. It crossed my mind to just make this week all about him, and that's when the internal war began. Follow predetermined rules, or give in to the crazed mini-obsession?

     Ultimately, the side for following the rules won out. How sad. Since the only order on the list is train-of-thought, BF is last. After all, it's only been a few days since I "discovered" his awesomeness. If I think about this betrayal anymore, I'll start feeling super-awful, so let's move on. Keeping with the older guy theme, this one's 26 years older than me! Yay! Bonus: He's gay. Well, he'd be officially gay if he weren't so private with his private life. Pshh.

This picture is in the dictionary
under "silver fox."

     Yes, Anderson Cooper. Let it be known: If you want me to think you're hot, you should be older than my dad, and being gay will raise your chances. Of course, I doubt gay guys care which girls think they're hot. I lead such a pathetic existence!

     For those of you who don't know, Andy here hosts a daytime talk show and a CNN news program. I've never watched either of those. Really, the only things I know about him (besides his yummy looks) come from Wikipedia and instances when Stephen Colbert mocks him. Poor Andy. His goofs are cute, though, see? And he can make fun of himself.

     He also sings Friday here:

     Okay, that's enough video. Here are some pictures. Enjoy...or else.

"Hey, let's go sit in the road!"
"Only if you take my picture."

Here, Anderson is told about the existence of bronies.

It looks like he's in the middle of an interrogation.
Now, is he the good cop, or the bad cop?

Mmm, look at those arms.

This reminds me of those movie posters. You know, the ones
with the vaguely famous lead actor, about obscure
political drama?

The caption here makes me giggle. A lot.

Cho Chang, Y'all

     I was bored and had AVPM on the brain, so the only logical thing to do was take it to Omegle. This girl...she made my day. No, my week. I felt so bad for her, because putting up with sex-driven masturbation machines is never fun. She stayed in character, though. The parenthetical after my question was a shout-out to a different girl who dealt with a different creep to answer my question. What troopers.

     Yes, Cho, I did enjoy the conversation. It made me supermegafoxyawesomeHAPPY.

Wow-You're-Hot Wednesday: Another Beginning

     To continue on Monday's theme-within-a-theme, I wanted to do another theme for today. At the moment, Mondays and Wednesdays include an hour-long block of me sitting in a library with nothing to do. This seems to be a perfect time to write inane blog posts. Obviously, since Monday has an alliterative theme, Wednesday should, too. So, what would I want to blog about? Music - done. Hmm...hot guys! I like hot guys. Of course, I had to make it into a semi-descriptive word/phrase starting with the letter W. Thus, "Wow-You're-Hot."

     The guys featured here won't be just any guys. These are celebrities, which means they're rich in addition to being hot. Now, since beauty is in the eye of the beholder, there may (probably will) be some guys featured that you find not-hot, or just plain unattractive. Deal with it. It's my blog.

     Where do I find these men? I never forget a hot face. Once someone in a movie, on tv, or in some online feature catches my eye, I always remember him. For easy access, I have a list saved onto my computer of 29 cute celebrities. That's not even a year's worth if I do one a week, but don't worry. There are always new faces out there.

     I'll just go down the list, which is in absolutely no order whatsoever. So, without further ado, here's the first Wednesday feature:

Oh...hello.

     Stephen Colbert, everyone.  (The t is silent. For real.) In case you aren't familiar with him and are too lazy to Google, he's the host of the Colbert Report (again, silent t), a late-night "talk show" on Comedy Central. His character is an extreme right-wing...well, nut. Strangely enough, some of his most devoted viewers are the ones he's making fun of. He's that convincing.

     He's funny, he's intelligent, he's a great speaker. Oh, and he's hot. Don't forget that. Those eyes. That smile. I also love his hair. I love it so much that one of my life's goals is to touch that hair. When he shaved his head, I wanted to die. He's like Samson -- nothing without his locks.

     I watch the Report every night it's on. It's like a pilgrimage of sorts, except with less movement and more eye strain. In fact, I'm writing this while waiting for the show to come on. Only 8 minutes...with that said, I think it's time to wrap this up. I hardly did the man justice, but words simply cannot describe some things. I'll leave you with more pictures instead. There are captions only because I have a hard time keeping my thoughts to myself.

His right ear was damaged. It makes him more human! D:

Get rid of the flag and we'll be okay.

Again...that hair. I want it for myself.

He was young once? Apparently, he was
going through a "phase."

He has a serious side! =D

A close-up of the above pic, but with truthiness added in.